:: school starts in one week ::

I've been preparing for it like a crazy person; between the family conference (two weeks ago), a sister michigan road trip (last week), both works (book store & internship; interspersed throughout), and a necessary re-watch of both the importance of being earnest and pride and prejudice ('95 duh), I am proud to say I have still managed to do some lettering -- although I have not managed to let anyone know about it. 

and I am still the inimitable master of run-on sentences.

:: speed-reading, summarized ::

are you finding yourself lacking time to read? here are some one-line book summaries of your favorite books so that you can relive the glory in .2367 seconds.

- - -

our mutual friend; or,
A Dead Guy Resembles An Alive Guy Who Gets Married And Inherits A Whole Lot of Money

a room with a view; or,
Fate Is Italy

all quiet on the western front; or,
I Am Using The Bathroom In A Field And Eating Everything I Can Get My Hands On

the scarlet pimpernel; or,
A "Really Smart" Lady Doesn't Even Know Who Her Husband Is And Almost Gets Him Killed

the glass menagerie; or,
Glass Is Fragile, Unicorns Don't Exist, Cute Guys Are Jerks

mara, daughter of the nile; or,
A Guttersnipe Gets Hired To Kill Her Secret Crush And Curses In Babylonian

a separate peace; or,
I Get Myself Confused With My Best Frenemy

secret garden; or,
Two Kids Get Healthy By Playing Outside

catch-22; or,
McWatt Sings

north & south; or,
Cotton Mills Were Really Romantic In The 1840s

- - -

:: impatient much ::

you know when somebody is like, "guess what," and you're like, "what," and they're like, "oh wait -- let me drink some water real long," or "let me pant because I rushed here," or "oh, never mind"? this is another witty thing:

"thou comest to use thy tongue; thy story quickly." 

– macbeth, act 5, scene 5 

:: SIDRTL - e. m. forster ::

- - -

(fyi, SIDRTL stands for "Something I Drew Related To Literature", and it's not like that was a thing before I made it a thing. it's just that I love acronyms. I can't resist them. and I make them up constantly: CdA! iow, carpe di-acrony-em.)

:: another great one ::

this one-liner is definitely a favorite. I mean, you can't get much better than wodehouse, right? so yeah. this is really good.

“right ho, jeeves.” 

- right ho, jeeves, [pick a chapter]
(p. g. wodehouse) 

:: warning! read with caution! ::

!! this sentence has been known to induce fainting in elegant females. !!

“you must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.” 

- pride & prejudice, ch. 34
(jane austen) 

:: reason no. 12,695 ::

...that everyone should read dickens, in two words.

eugene. wrayburn.

"'you hear, eugene?' said lightwood over his shoulder. 'you are deeply interested in lime.'
'without lime,' returned the unmoved barrister-at-law, 'my life would be unilluminated by a ray of hope.'"

- our mutual friend, ch. 12
(charles dickens)

:: quote of the day ::

“I won’t say she was silly, but I think one of us was silly, and it wasn’t me.” 

- wives and daughters, ch. 35
(elizabeth gaskell)

:: how I win arguments, every time ::

"my dear, if you must have the last word, don't let it be a truism."

- wives & daughters
(elizabeth gaskell)

:: today's nugget of wisdom ::

in fact, there’s nothing that keeps its youth, 
so far as I know, but a tree and truth. 
(this is a moral that runs at large. 
take it. you’re welcome. no extra charge.) 

- the wonderful one-hoss shay 
(oliver wendell holmes)